Oh Christmas Tree, oh Christmas Tree, so cheap I bought 4 of you
With plans to sting you up with lights,
and on my porch you'd glow all night.
Oh Christmas Tree, oh Christmas Tree, please don't try to kill me.
And it is with that little introduction I bring you this:
Exhibit A:
Seemingly harmless harbinger of seasonal joy and symbol of everlasting life. Purchased just after Christmas last year for the extremely small clearance fee of $.50.
Exhibit B:
The tag I only just noticed after "handling the plastic used in this product."
WHAT THE WHAT??? Is this legal??? Is this America???
I mean, I really do just want to put them on my porch cutely adorned with shining mini lights of merriment. Is that a crime? Should I just throw these away? But what if some Christian homeless person rifles through my dumpster and finds himself a fun sized tree just the right height for his shopping cart? I don't know if I can live with that kind of guilt.
Can it really be that bad if these things even made it to store shelves? Target, oh Target what have you done?