I'll Be Home For Christmas, If Only In My Dreams

So, I'm behind. I still haven't posted anything from our Thanksgiving in Vegas and Christmas is less than a week away. I'm happy to report that all of our gifts are purchased and wrapped...except for one that is still being shipped.

This really is the most wonderful time of the year but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little sad to be spending the Holiday away from my mommy and daddy. I'm a big baby when it comes to Christmas. I like traditions. I like my traditions. I'm 27 years old and every Christmas I can remember was spent at 96 Raypaula Drive. I'm 27 years old and every Christmas morning I wake up bright eyed (its the one day a year that happens) excited to see what surprises Santa has in store.

This year is going to be different, I'm sure it will be great, but it will be different. I'll be with Shawn's family. I 'm excired to spend Christmas with them, there's no one I love to tease more than my father-in-law but I won't be with my mom and dad. I won't be with my sister. I'll be seeing Christmas through the eyes of a mother for the first time and that will be really fun but also different.

I guess its just sad because I have to grow up a little and as the baby of eight, that can be hard to do. People always say the magic of Christmas is for children but I've always felt defensive about that. Christmas is for us all and I love the magic of it.

So Mom, Dad, Amber, have an extra special time opening presents on Christmas Eve, reading Luke 2 until you sing Glory to God all together, wake up to Santa's loot and a yummy funnel cake breakfast. Me? I'll be seeing a whole new world of traditions...and trying to keep Jack the fat cat from wondering in to sleep with me.

I hope this didn't bum anyone out, it wasn't meant to, just my thoughts. For a heart warming experience look at my sweet baby with Santa!!! Now that's a new tradition I can get behind.

Blessing Day

These are Berkley's Great Grandpa Udy's baby booties (so 95 years old).

In our Church we don't do baptisms until a child is at least 8 years old, we believe that children are born without original sin therefore they don't need to be baptised until what we call "the age of accountability." That being said, we do have one religious rite of passage I guess you could call it, that infants have, its called a Blessing, and Berk had his today.

I look absolutely disgusting in our family pictures from today (as Shawn's cousin's son put it this afternoon, and I quote, "good luck losing all that fat from being pregnant" without the conversation being even close to the topic) so all you get is a bombardment of pictures of Berkley Aaron.

Berky's forte...spit bubbles.

Seriously, is he not a doll???

Sweet smirk.

Playing with Aunt Bethany.

Nothing Says Happy Holidays Like Poisonous Decor

Oh Christmas Tree, oh Christmas Tree, you're tiny cute and so cheap
Oh Christmas Tree, oh Christmas Tree, so cheap I bought 4 of you

With plans to sting you up with lights,
and on my porch you'd glow all night.

Oh Christmas Tree, oh Christmas Tree, please don't try to kill me.

And it is with that little introduction I bring you this:

Exhibit A:

Seemingly harmless harbinger of seasonal joy and symbol of everlasting life. Purchased just after Christmas last year for the extremely small clearance fee of $.50.

Exhibit B:

The tag I only just noticed after "handling the plastic used in this product."

WHAT THE WHAT??? Is this legal??? Is this America???

I mean, I really do just want to put them on my porch cutely adorned with shining mini lights of merriment. Is that a crime? Should I just throw these away? But what if some Christian homeless person rifles through my dumpster and finds himself a fun sized tree just the right height for his shopping cart? I don't know if I can live with that kind of guilt.

Can it really be that bad if these things even made it to store shelves? Target, oh Target what have you done?

Matchy, Matchy

I forgot to take before pictures, but my coworkers went in on an unfinished wooden high chair for me as a shower gift. I wanted something to match my kitchen and I knew I wouldn't find one...actually I looked and I didn't find one. The only wooden ones I saw were brown and my kitchen is black. I just didn't want something cartoony because everything else that has to do with baby screams baby and as a piece of furniture I thought it'd be great to scream, oh wow it matches. Yeah...I'm a dork.

So, I painted this bad boy black and whipped up some little cushions for Berk's tush out of the same fabric that I reupholstered my kitchen chairs in.

The result is super cute if you ask me...even if the back cushion turned out a little narrow.

Happy Halloween, Merry Christmas

The most wonderful thing about Tiggers, is Tiggers are wonderful things, their tops are made out of rubber, their bottoms are made out of springs...
Here's Berkley's second Halloween costume. Grandma and Tessa Lindseth sent this cute little costume to us, size 0-3 months and when we got it we laughed out loud knowing that it would never fit him. Well, it mostly does now...and only 2 weeks late. The good news is, he makes an adorable Tigger.

My friend Tiffany is a crafty crochet queen and she made Berk a cute little blue brimmed hat as a shower present for me. Then she came by to visit today with this gem:

Moo I mean, Boo

Berky is a cow, we're supposed to be farmers, but you can't really tell that we're farmers. I was in a big ol' flannel night gown to look like I went out to milk the cow, but mostly people looked at me like I was crazy. At least Berk looked cute, right?!?

Photography Fun

As you may or may not know I have been interested in photography since taking a few classes in high school. I love taking stills and interesting angles of objects and have never been great with portraits or landscapes, however I did work in a portrait studio after my Freshman year of collage and I loved that.

As you may or may not know I have been the victim of theft a time or two in my life. I had an old Canon 35mm SLR that I loved and it was stolen from my car in Las Vegas. I have been a film snob for a long time. Specifically a black and white film snob...I don't know that a roll of color film ever entered my camera. I love the look of film pictures. I love the feel of film pictures. And I fantasize, even still, about having a dark room in my home someday. Developing your own film and your own photos is so so so fun and rewarding. I thought I could never have a digital SLR because that would mean giving up on my dark room dream. Alas I began to desire a digital SLR knowing that until we're rich and have a mansion in which my dark room will be located digital is a bit more practical.

With that huge introduction here you have a few of my attempts at photographing my new boy with my new camera my loving husband bestowed on me for my birthday. (And since I'm usually the one behind the camera, if you'd like to see what I look like lately visit my friend April's new photography blog, she did a mini shoot of me and my boys.)

Snappin' Away

Grandpa Lindseth requested more pictures, and as the only grandparent who hasn't yet met Berk I figured I should oblige. Everyone keeps saying he looks just like Shawn. I don't see it. I don't really see anyone, which is weird because I usually see resemblances pretty easily. I suppose its different when its your own child. It's ok though, at least they say he looks like a good lookin' man. (Click on the collage to enlarge)

Gettin' Chubby

This skinny baby jumped from the 10th percentile at 2 weeks to 8 pounds 5.5 ounces and the 25th percentile at 4 weeks. Happy one month birthday Berky!

The Details

This is super long, its kind of more for me so its detailed. Feel free to ignore.

I'm not really sure how long to say my labor was because I was in denial that I was actually in labor until we drove to the hospital and the nurse said I was 4 cm dilated.

On September 16th I woke up to pee for the 18th time and had trouble falling back to sleep because of a this-must-be-braxton-hicks-because-everyone-has-a-false-alarm-contraction. Those continued through the early morning and they were definitely painful, which none of my braxton hicks had been to that point in my pregnancy but I figured the farther along you get, the worse they get. Anyway, I had a Dr.'s appointment that morning, had a contraction while I was in there with the nurse, she said it seemed to be pretty painful if it were fake, and then the Doctor came in and I was at 2 cm. Super. Less I'd have to do in real labor.

I got my oil changed, went to Kohl's, met a friend for lunch and then headed home to do some cleaning. By the time I got home I was in pain so I decided to lay down. I watched a movie, took a nap and woke up in a ton of pain. Shawn came in and I told him I'd had contractions all day. By 8:30 they were getting worse so we thought it might be a good idea to start timing them. By midnight they were less than 10 minutes apart but inconsistent. I thought they would just keep getting closer and closer if they were real. Plus the pain was all really low and I thought real contractions were the whole uterus. It certainly didn't feel like the whole uterus.

We were in such denial about it being real labor that when we packed the bag we didn't include the last minute things like toothbrushes, hair brush etc. By the time I started to cry with one we decided to add those last minute things to the bag and go to the hospital. We knew we'd be turned away.

The whole way to the hospital I didn't have one contraction. Not one. We parked and just sat for a second debating whether or not to go in. We decided that since we'd driven I might as well get checked out and see what's going on with my body since I certainly wasn't in labor. As we were walking in I had a contraction. Confirmation. At the call box Shawn said, what do I say? We both felt stupid. I told him to say, I think my wife might be in labor.

Once we got in and my vitals were taken the nurse did the exam. She told me I was 4 cm and she would admit me. Shawn and I just looked at each other in disbelief. I told him to go get the stuff out of the car. We weren't about to bring it in and be laughed out of the hospital with 2 pillows and a suitcase.

Within an hour and a half I was really wanting the epidural. I didn't know if I was far enough along to get it because I had read that you should be at a 5. The nurse said a 4 was fine and she sent in the anaesthesiologist. As soon as he walked in the door I started a terrible contraction. I asked for something to puke in and as I vomited I peed. I thought my water was breaking but the nurse put this stuff on it that turns blue if its amniotic fluid. Mine didn't turn blue. Leave it to me to wet the bed while vomiting and contracting.

As soon as the epidural was in I felt instant relief and I was examined and at a 7. Progress. My water still hadn't broken and the nurse said it was bulging. Now with some pain relief we decided to try to rest up for the big moment and just as I was drifting off I felt the water balloon inside of me pop. It startled me and I gasped, startling Shawn and Kim awake as well.

Knowing that my water broke made it hard to sleep or relax. Things were getting exciting. Before we knew it I was at an 8...9...and then I felt the urge to push. The nurse examined me and said I could start pushing, we got my legs ready and then within a few... about 3 pushes Berkley was crowning. She was a little shocked and said we should probably wait for the Doctor to push some more. We waited for the Doctor for what seemed like an eternity, in reality it was probably 10-15 minutes. The whole time I kept feeling the urge to push. Finally he walked in and the fun started. I pushed and Shawn said, he's got hair, I pushed and Shawn said, his head is like, 70% out, I pushed and the Doctor said, the cord is doubled wrapped around his neck, I pushed and everyone said, look down, I pushed and Berkley was all there and I knew he was tiny. It's kind of a blurr after that, I remember seeing the Doctor hand the scissors to Shawn, I remember him cutting the cord. I remember Berk being placed on my stomach and one of the people in there (all the sudden there were like, 5 medical personnel in there I have no clue at what point they all came in, all I remember is one nurse and one doctor) kept rubbing him with the blanket and she said, my job is to keep him crying. I remember them taking him away to do all of his tests and junk. I remember someone saying, they don't get any pinker than this and that felt great to hear. I remember them saying he was 19 inches and seeing him on the scale at 6 pounds 0.8 ounces.

What a crazy night that was!!! I love my baby. I'm so happy he's here. Shawn and I are thrilled to have a family together.

Cute Baby

Heeeeeere's Berkley!